How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

[Yggdrasil]

Hei guys -

I'm trying to get my 12-year-old hooked on golf, but it's tough. I tend to throw 1,000 things at him, he gets frustrated, and "hates it" (I'm pretty sure some of you know exactly what I'm talking about). So I'm keeping quiet, letting him find our for himself, as much as I can (when he's willing to play)...

Anyway, he loves it when he hits a good shot, but in his backswing, he almost stands straight up, and of course you know he misses, tops, and digs craters often.

I'm on the horns of a dilemma here: not tell him anything, he hates it because he can't hit the ball, or instruct him, and he hates it because of all the advice I'm giving him.

Sorry, he refuses to go to a pro (or class), so I've got to get him a bit further along by myself. If he just gets hooked a bit, we've got some great junior clubs around.

I KNOW some of you guys have successfully negotiated this obstacle: so please give me some advice?


Best Regards
Charles

[oldwease]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

Sound advice from cmays - there's nothing like 'peer pressure' for getting a kid to want to improve....

[BrianW]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

Here is an alternative way to consider the problem! Ask yourself why he has an urge to lift himself up in the swing, I would suggest it's not because he wants to top the ball.

Like most people he is probably doing it due to a misunderstanding of how he should be hitting the ball, he probably has a natural urge to lift it into the air by scooping the clubface under it, his brain will be telling him to move his weight onto his back leg in the downswing then raise his spine angle in preparation to lever the club downwards.

If he can understand that to ht the ball well he needs to compress the core of the ball onto the sweetspot of the clubface and to do this he should keep his hands ahead of the clubface in the downswing and try to hit the ball just above it's equator with a descending blow. He will not be able to do this if he lifts himself.

Now! Exactly how you communicate this to a 12 year old is a slightly different thing. The advice for him to play with others is good, another would be to get him to become a junior member of a club and take some lessons, they do tend to take more notice of other people, it's a bit like trying to teach a family member to drive.

[Yggdrasil]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

I read someone else cured their bobbing by taking the club away, not "lifting" it. .... might work, but if it doesn't, he'll be even more frustrated...

&sorry, none of his friends play, and I can't get him to try the junior club or take a lesson (shame, the junior clubs are excellent)...

I'll try teaching him one thing, he'll listen, but I better choose well....

[BrianW]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

I read someone else cured their bobbing by taking the club away, not "lifting" it. .... might work, but if it doesn't, he'll be even more frustrated...

&sorry, none of his friends play, and I can't get him to try the junior club or take a lesson (shame, the junior clubs are excellent)...

I'll try teaching him one thing, he'll listen, but I better choose well....

Sorry! I meant lifting the ball into the air with the club, not lifting the club up.

[Yggdrasil]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

No, I understood what you meant, scooping the ball, but he's hitting down pretty well right now. It's just this lunging up and down - I couldn't hit as many shots as he does, if I raised and lowered my head like him... it' just amazing the number of good shots he actually makes.... (but also an amazing number of potholes, tops, and misses....) Boy, I love having him play with me, so I'd like to see him connecting a lot greater percentage.... (I'll bet $100 he'll join the juniors if he thinks he can be good....)

[BrianW]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

No, I understood what you meant, scooping the ball, but he's hitting down pretty well right now. It's just this lunging up and down - I couldn't hit as many shots as he does, if I raised and lowered my head like him... it' just amazing the number of good shots he actually makes.... (but also an amazing number of potholes, tops, and misses....) Boy, I love having him play with me, so I'd like to see him connecting a lot greater percentage.... (I'll bet $100 he'll join the juniors if he thinks he can be good....)

Tell him you will not let him join the juniors then as you dont want him getting better than you, he will probably be down there like a shot

[Yggdrasil]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

Might work, Brian - He only hits about 150m max. and on the last hole I bet him a dollar he couldn't put the ball in the lake, about 160m out. Of course he splashed it in with 5m to spare.... Already tried refusing to let him join the juniors, but he was just happy....

[GregJWillis]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

Have a playing lesson with a pro where you are both the students.

But tell your son, you have a "friend" joining you for a round one day. Make sure your son knows this really is a friend of yours, so make up a story about work or something.

Once he sees how this guy plays, and he makes some impromptu suggestions, they might stick better. You will also get some sound playing advice that is also hopefully worth it. If he still resists any advice, maybe the fact that you were willing to take advice from someone, and he listens to that advice, you might get some subconscience absorbtion. You might even start to imitate your son's swing a bit and have the pro suggest the tip to stop that...you know, setup the situation on the tee box where you are all standing and he is basically forced to hear it.

Good luck!

[Yggdrasil]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

Yeah, good trick Greg - I bet you'd be just the right pro "friend" to do it (and we would be real friends by end-of-round). Doubt I can get away with it, but could be fun to try ("hey, you guys quit talking so much & let's play!" when he gets some instructions, just to mislead him...). I'm also sure he'd soak it up if complained about my head bobbing, and asked for some tips on fixing it....

not a bad suggestion, really, & now at seasons-end I know pro who wants to have some "fun" rounds, anyway...

problem is really getting him to play the same day i've got the pro lined up "not today Dad, I've got "plans!")...

[GregJWillis]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

12 is right on the edge of his independance and inspiration, and your insanity. You will have to pretty tricky to make sure he does not figure it out.

[Yggdrasil]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

yep, but I'm already taking big chances. Practically promised him a puppy to get him out with me yesterday.... he loved it.... and will probably refuse to play next time.... Best trick would be to get a kid his age from the junior club to play with us. If he made a friend who plays, the deal would be sealed....

Hmmm. Maybe a pro And a junior kid. Go for the big trick....

[GregJWillis]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

Right, the "Friend's son!"... This could get expensive, but if you are serious.

[Yggdrasil]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

yeah-yeah, I wouldn't pay a junior, but maybe get a junior and his dad to play a round with us? one who is also fairly new? "just happened to book the same time as us...." could backfire, but if he doesn't know, it wouldn't matter if he didn't like the other kid....

Now we're getting somewhere...

[Martin Levac]

Re: How to fix my son's head bobbing ?

A short lesson on teaching.

The course is for play, the range is for practice and perhaps lessons. When you promise you want to play with him, play your own game and allow him to do the same. I say "when you promise" because telling him you're going to play with him for 18 holes is precisely a promise that you must keep. When you begin to interfere with his actions and stuff, you break your promise of "playing with him". He'll resent it and stop having fun. Golf is about fun first and foremost, allow him to have some.

Trust him, he will know what to do much more quickly than you. Even without any instruction, he will figure out some way to do what he must. He is not hampered by the inhibitions of adulthood. Yet. Allow him to take advantage of this freedom to do what he wants the way he wants. Every time you interfere with his learning, you short-circuit his pleasure in the discovery. Do this enough times and he will surely resent that.

You may ask if he needs help. But not every single shot or every game for that matter. Trust him to tell you if he does. Or simply tell him to ask if he needs any help. Otherwise, don't volunteer any unsollicited help or advice. Now take all the advice given to you here and put it in your pocket until your son asks for it. And you never know, sometimes the best advice is no advice at all.

Have fun.