A Richard Hammond - Straight down the middle like a rocket, then veers off into the rough at the last minute.
An Adolf - Taking two shots in a bunker.
An Arthur Scargill - Great strike, but a poor result.
A Rodney King - Over-clubbed.
An O.J. Simpson - Shouldn't have, but got away with it.
A Condom - Safe, but didn't feel right.
An elephant's arse - it's high and it stinks.
A sister-in-law - I'm up there, but I know that I shouldn't be.
A Gerry Adams - a provisional.
A Dennis Wise - nasty little five footer.
A Rock Hudson - thought it was straight, but it wasn't.
A ladyboy - Looks like an easy hole, but all may not be what it seems.
A gynaecologist's assistant - just shaves the hole.
Does your husband play ? for when a man hits a short tee shot.
A Cuban - needs one more revolution.
A Brazillian - hits the narrow stip down the middle.
A Glen Miller - kept low and didn't make it over the water.
A Princess Grace - should have taken a driver.
A Princess Di - shouldn't have taken a driver.
A Michael Jackson - fading away.
An Anna Kournikova - looks great, but unlikely to get a result.
A Vinnie Jones - nasty kick when you're not expecting it.
A Tony Blair - too much spin.
A Jamie Oliver - you really want to smack it, but you can't.
An Adolf - Taking two shots in a bunker.
An Arthur Scargill - Great strike, but a poor result.
A Rodney King - Over-clubbed.
An O.J. Simpson - Shouldn't have, but got away with it.
A Condom - Safe, but didn't feel right.
An elephant's arse - it's high and it stinks.
A sister-in-law - I'm up there, but I know that I shouldn't be.
A Gerry Adams - a provisional.
A Dennis Wise - nasty little five footer.
A Rock Hudson - thought it was straight, but it wasn't.
A ladyboy - Looks like an easy hole, but all may not be what it seems.
A gynaecologist's assistant - just shaves the hole.
Does your husband play ? for when a man hits a short tee shot.
A Cuban - needs one more revolution.
A Brazillian - hits the narrow stip down the middle.
A Glen Miller - kept low and didn't make it over the water.
A Princess Grace - should have taken a driver.
A Princess Di - shouldn't have taken a driver.
A Michael Jackson - fading away.
An Anna Kournikova - looks great, but unlikely to get a result.
A Vinnie Jones - nasty kick when you're not expecting it.
A Tony Blair - too much spin.
A Jamie Oliver - you really want to smack it, but you can't.
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